How can I trust you? I don’t even know you.

I recently coached a leader frustrated by the lack of teamwork and collaboration between her and her peer’s teams.  

Senior Director: The tension is palpable. There’s definitely an air of blame, and each team member is trying to prove their value. Why don’t they respect each other and work together productively?

Me: How well do the team members know each other? Not what each other is responsible for, but who each person is - what’s important to them? What are their strengths and values? 

Senior Director: Hmmm. Good question. Honestly, some people know each other, but not well. We’re under immense pressure, so everyone is focused on completing the work. We don’t take the time to talk about those things. 

Me: How can you expect someone to trust and respect you if they don’t even know who you are and what’s important to you? What if you invested the time upfront to build connections and lay the groundwork for trust versus spending the time down the road trying to recover and establish connections in an untrustworthy environment? 

Whether you are leading a new team or finding yourself in a position where trusting collaboration isn’t the go-to behavior, consider these practices:

Get to know the individuals for their strengths and values. Ask questions such as: How would your peers describe your greatest strengths? What are your values - your guiding principles for your life? 

Establish team norms for working together. Ask what behaviors will help us create an environment of trust and collaboration. To set the tone, capture all responses and start meetings with a reminder of these agreed-upon behaviors.

Talk explicitly about conflict. Ask when we disagree, because we will, how do we want to do that respectively? What behaviors tell me that you are addressing the conflict with positive intent?

Be clear about your definition of collaboration. Nothing is more frustrating than teams coming together without understanding their role in the collaborative process. Am I here to offer input? Are we brainstorming? Are we making a decision together? 

Start each meeting, project, or initiative with a shared vision of success. What does success look like at the end of… this meeting, this project, or this initiative?

Want a worksheet you can use in your next team meeting to learn about each others’ values? Email me at Linda@Glasstalent.com, and I’ll happily share!

One, Two, Pick a Few… There are better ways to prioritize your time.

Ah, the season of summer is upon us. Remember when you were a kid? My sister and I used to run in the fields for hours, playing with mud and building forts (clearly a farmgirl). Our priorities were clear. Get dirty. Imagine. Have fun. Simple.

As an adult, summer is often called the season of utmost insanity. Kids are out of school, or almost. Vacations are in full swing. Summer Fridays’ are happening (are those still a thing? - they should be!)

• Can you get this out before you go on vacation?

• Several people are out this week, so let’s shorten that deadline. 

• The client needs this two weeks earlier to meet their holiday launch. 

• Oh, and Timmy forgot his lunch for summer camp. Seriously?!

When my kids were little, I remember producing a massive Excel spreadsheet to map who was where, when, and how they were getting to and from. I went after that spreadsheet rigorously and was relentless about what we would say yes to and where we would pass.

At the same time, I was juggling a demanding full-time job and just letting May roll into June on the work front. I realized I lacked the same rigor and reflection needed to keep my priorities in check at work. 

Suppose you find yourself in the same boat. In that case, I’m offering three essential exercises to reset your priorities and have a hope of managing your time effectively until the seasons pass once again in the fall!

Stop the noise and land the swirl of current “To Do’s.” Nothing creates more stress than a swirl of “to-do’s” following us like Pig Pen from the Peanuts. 

1. Set a timer for 20 minutes. 

2. List all the activities, regardless of size, that are demanding your time right now. Then, look back to your calendar and the week ahead. 

3. Now that you have a complete list of everything go through them line by line and answer these three questions.

   • Is this of High Importance?

   • Does it have to be completed by the End of the Week?

   • Can/ should someone else do it?

4. Based on that, determine your action: Delegate, Defer, Decide, Do Now.

Assess and adjust your priorities for the next three months. Open your calendar. Focus on the next three months and audit where you are spending your time.

1. Are there regular meetings that can hit a pause or become less frequent over the summer months?

2. Are the meetings that have unclear agendas or purposes that you have accepted? Change your response to “maybe” with a request for the purpose of the meeting. Once you receive an agenda or purpose, decide whether this is something you need to attend or whether you can delegate it to someone else. Or perhaps just get the meeting notes!

3. Which meetings are the highest priorities? These are the meetings directly tied to your quarterly priorities and deliverables. Have you scheduled time to prepare for these meetings? Map out and secure time in your calendar to plan and finish the work.

Practice persistent pausing. 

1. Any time anyone asks something of you, practice pausing before answering. 

2. Ask a question rather than immediately responding yes or no. 

• Them: Can you attend this meeting next week for me? It’s imperative. 

• You: Can you tell me more about the meeting? I’l need to get back to you

And yes, I eventually created an Excel spreadsheet to support prioritization and time management, complete with color coding and auto-populating suggested actions. 

Want your prioritization template? Email me at Linda@Glasstalent.com, and I’ll happily share!